A Story Written in Ash

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When I write, I give it like blood 
all my emotions like DNA 
unique to me 
only it can be shared with others 
it passes through to the world 
I’ll never know if it lives on 
a day 
a week 
a month 
a year 
…forever 
but I won’t stop bleeding my words 
I’ll still give away my life 
for longer life
for my story 

Out of Body, Into Life

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today, the air was different
I paid attention to the seabirds
watched the tide go all the way out
to my left, a boat hummed away from the harbour
to my right, lost sheep chew green grass into yellow
a car passes by and the people wave
while Jack the black cat sits still on a picket fence
and Patti, the old neighbour strokes the last drop of paint
…against his saltbox home
I am shaken by something I can’t understand
an algorithm of existing in a moment of my life
seeing clear because that life stopped me in my tracks
pushed my breath straight to my lungs
grew my heart for the love of living
filled me with the longing for more
I know now that there is something more to every day
my heart was smothered and my soul blinded
until my spirit had enough and awakened

Whispers Toward The Darkness

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Another ten paces and I fall again 
to my knees 
the truth too unbearable 
like the scorch of the sun, it will burn hot 
no running will get you further away from it 
no amount of water could ever cleanse 
no sound can drown the songs of deceit 
when devils are allowed to dance all around you
their voices are soft, tempting, and following
their gestures a play before only my eye
pull me and push me…my story, my actions, my ending
I’m in a trance and see the world beyond this painful pane
fraternizing with demons and laying proud in the shadows
but the promises I have received still lure me
so for now I will bed the malevolent
and risk the glass being broken
 

Dark Puzzles, Black Pieces

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Lying awake in the dares of the night 
between the seconds of darkness that it created 
anxious, with a pulsing heart 
a sweaty grip 
gripping tightly so wishing for light 
I watch the shadows and silhouettes patrol 
alone by vicinity 
crowded by bonded blood 
the air steals my voice 
blankets smother my breath 
sounds muffle the familiar 
it’s only me now 
in a world of living nightmares 
it was always only me 
this life is a puzzle 
with many different pieces 
let me throw away the black ones
so something beautiful can be complete

Fading to Black

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In the night 
like a ghost 
nothing is ever seen 
premeditation a superpower 
skewing the real, while dancing with the devil 
visiting worlds very far apart 
the sky in one, a sky 
the other could be anywhere envisioned on the spot 
in the sweat, in the sins, in the climax
flying close to the sun 
is a high like no other 
a racing heart is a drug buried deep in the same shadows 
but one beam of light and it all goes away
the curtain comes down
no more beautiful horizon
no more escape 
 
 
  

One Saturday

My home

One Saturday 
an old used-up weekend in my life 
back when I was a small boy who took shortcuts home 
I remember that Saturday and how golden was the hillside
how the fences cast shadows through blades of long grass
while it danced when the wind played the lead
along the way I ducked clotheslines with flapping white blankets and wool socks
that made dogs bark for no reason
almost home I stopped to take a drink 
from a cold stream with those floaty things 
a puttering engine in the distance pulled me up for a look
when I do I see a fishing boat breaking the glass harbour
I become lost in the triangle wake of that trail the vessel leads behind 
as its crew steams toward their living into the greying eve 
while seagulls give chase for little company
it stretches a few seconds for me for some reason
captivates me, holds my breath, takes grip of my soul
until the lighthouse steals away the attention
enough to break my trance 
in time to hear the voice of my grandmother who sings my name
through the hills 
beckons my return from the adventures of my childhood 
it won’t be long now, just cross the torn bush garden and the triangle stone
like I remember…one Saturday
 
 

The Shadows Are Still There

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I stood there high and saw the sorrow from loss below 
my heart did nothing 
tomorrows came with tears all around but still nothing 
why did you get to take the both of us away 
from a life of no regret 
you controlled everything 
now you are nothing 
not even a thing anymore 
you should have been made to be someone who lives with it too 
but instead got to leave with half of the secrets 
I bare the weight of two 
heavy with memories of darkness 
pained by unheard screams of listen to me 
I grieving not death 
no, I am grieving the loss chances 
to face hurt with words 
stab hard with scars shown with no shame  
be the trial seeking reason and forgiveness 
only I forever will walk the green mile alone 
and life as I know it throws your sentence away forever 

 
 
 
 

Beacon of Heart

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I wrote a letter 
on a beacon of hope 
gave fate the return address 
but sadly, I still sit and wait
for tomorrow
and tomorrow
maybe tomorrow
but sadly, tomorrow never comes
every day is a search
every day a wish
please
please
oh please
but sadly, nothing is found or returned
some days I see shadows
some nights a mirage
could it be
could it be
could it be
but sadly, none of them are really you
there are moments where I believe
there are moments where I truly feel
that I will see you again in time
as it passes
and passes
and passes
but sadly, you're still disappeared