This time it didn’t matter if I held you
I guess my heart grew stronger from all the breaks
Like a junky with a kicked addiction
my track marks no longer have aches
I fought through the pain of withdrawal
alone and in despair
Worth nothing more to you, forgotten
in some gutter behind nowhere
Day and night I yearned for another fix
even if it was to be my last
Only it was you who controlled the poison
Stronger than any vial or any glass
I had to kick this dirty habit
I just had to say goodbye
For the therapy of holding on to you
was worse than coming down from the high
Now, my veins are finally clean
suppressed from the urge of you
It took my own rock bottom to discover…
that a drug can be tainted too
Every day…I write you a love letter.
No pen, no paper, just what’s inside my heart.
I know they never reach you.
But, right now I’m OK with that.
Because, no matter how many words I’ve written, or how many more I’ll write.
My heart will never close what was, what is…what will forever be,
the best chapters of my life.
my love for you is like a book with stolen pages
beautiful words erased
everything’s torn from the very bind
words rewritten that were never mine
an unknown author with a tale of a broken heart
spends his lonely days with nowhere to start
his pen runs dry
there’s nothing more to capture
in this tragic love story without its final chapter
You broke my heart once more.
But, it’s OK.
At least it felt something.
Sometimes we have to let go of what’s killing us, even if it’s killing us to let go.